Anonymous asked: Why can't you get tattoos anymore?
For spiritual / religious reasons. I have reached a point in my journey that I will no longer be marking my body in any permanent manner (piercings, tattoos, brandings, cuttings, etc) unless done for a religious ritual.
asubmissiveintraining asked: Following up on your comment about unrealistic depictions of D/s- Are there some examples that are particularly glaring/annoying for you? I first saw the fantasy writings before playing myself, and though I still enjoy reading (and writing) fantasy, I was quite frustrated with it once I had the real deal. I'd be curious to learn what stood out for you, if anything.In a lot of BDSM erotica, the submissive gives so much and is left at the end. The relationships never work. This bothered me so much. I would read these books, and think to myself that I was just going to be used and then abandoned. I was horrified.
So much BDSM erotica shows submissives being treated like crap. If you are into objectification, being whored out, being humiliated, that’s great. But I am not. All I saw were submissives being treated in a manner that would destroy me mentally and spiritually. I wondered if this was the only way; I wondered how I could endure this type of treatment. Nowhere did I see a D/s relationship built on love and respect, with honest communication and negotiation.
Don’t even get me started on Fifty Shades of Grey. No aftercare, the contract being useless because they get into a relationship without her signing it, no service required of the submissive, the Dom being emotionally unavailable and manipulative, his behavior being blamed on childhood abuse, etc.
In my opinion Fifty Shades of Grey is even worse than the Sleeping Beauty series or The Story of O or any DeSade books. It depicts a current day relationship, and puts in enough jargon to make uneducated folks think it is legit. No one expects The Story of O to be how it really is. But people read Fifty Shades and think that’s how BDSM and D/s really are. And that scares the fuck out of me.